Finance situation between partners (unmarried)?

My patrner and I have lived together for 6 years and have been sharing bills half/half; to start with, anyway - the last couple of years he's been earning just about enough to pay maintenance for his kids, petrol, occassionally food and his phone (he pays his car insurance, tax etc with a credit card which I'm sending payments for) He bought the flat where we live about 6 months before I moved in and refuses to put me on the mortgage because it's 'his'. I'm beginning to think that I'm throwing money out of the window. I have reached a beaking point cos I'm really beginning to think that he'll bleed me dry. Anything I can do apart from not paying my share? All his debts (credit cards etc), mortgage, council tax, utility bills are in his name.

I'm in the UK

I'd move out if I were you, or get married. He will bleed you dry and he can kick you out and there is absolutely nothing you can do about it. Ignore anything anybody tells you about common law status, it's a falicy, in your situation you will have a very hard time proveing you have any capital interest in the property. Get some kind of legal contract to protect your interest or get out before you are completely broke. One has to question how seriously he is taking the relationship if he isn't prepared to put your name on the mortgage. Not exactly and equal partnership is it.

Are you in USA or UK?
Depends on where you are as to the answer.

PS, He sounds like a control freek so get rid and find someone who understands the word SHARE.

You have answered your own question. Move on.

Dont worry the law states if you have lived together for more than 6 months regardless of if you are on the mortgage or not you are entitled to half, married or not. You would have a very good case as there are records of you paying towards the bills, etc. If the bills are in his name he is responsible for them so they would not chase you for the money so maybe dont pay for a while, depends where your relationship is heading. If you did split up you would need a solictor to fight this for you and can take a while but you would be entitled to half unless your partner offered a settlement that you were willing to accept. I'd try to talk to him say you dont think it is fair and see how you can works the bills out differently.

Quit supporting this loser and move on.

Then find a good lawyer and get half of everything.

Can't you sit him down and talk to him? Explain that its not fair that you are paying so much but don't even have your name on the house deeds. I think you should talk to Citizens Advice first and find out what your legal position would be if you split up - I think you'd be entitled to a share in the home, but I'm not sure (you may find that on their website).
I think if you explain to him that its unreasonable but you don't mind if you split everything (including the flat), but he should not expect you to help him out so much financially.
If you weren't paying he'd be in debt.
You maybe should also think about writing wills, if he died you'd probably have a legal battle to stay in your home, he'll want to leave 'his' flat to his children probably, but you can get it tied up so that they can't evict you, you need legal advice.
Good luck

I'm in the USA and I bought a house last yr. My b/f moved in with me. He pays the mortgage, car payment and boat payment. I pay for EVERYTHING else. Including his kids needed items and gifts. He has NO credit. Everything is in MY name. He has left me hanging 3 different months this past yr. I wanted to put his name of everything but he owes our government as well as many other businesses...they will put a FREEZE on all accounts and properties that his name appears on. For this reason, everything is in MY name only. He even deposits his checks into MY account to pay these bills. He has no other way to cash his paychecks.

I am living your life over here in the states. I can't afford this stuff on my own. However, I say let your partner's bills go...ONLY pay what your promised to pay. They are in HIS name. I speak from experience...be fair about it but firm. Do NOT let him bleed you dry! I stopped and he is still with me. I let him know he can NOT use me. I won't let him mooch any more. Now you do it...I wish you well.

It is a pity that at school they do not prepare us for life ahead, especially now that so many couples live together without marriage.

Sit down together and write down all the costs you have for your common life. Do not count things like clothes cosmetics etc which are for one of you only. Then apportion those common costs in proportion to your income after tax.

In regard to the flat, it is his and you benefit from it, so you should pay something towards it, say 1/4 of the mortgage cost.

In regard to the car, if it is his property and used primarily by him, he should pay all its costs, except that if you go in it for a long distance, you should pay for the petrol, which is about half the total cost of mileage.

Naturally a man is expected to behave generously towards the girl he loves and he should not count every dollar.

If in the end, what money and assets remains is in approximate proportion to your income after tax, you know you got it about right. Good luck

Move out, you deserve someone better and a peace of mind.

I think that no matter what you do, you're throwing your money away unless your name is on the mortgage or he starts paying it. The argument could be made that you should pay half of what a normal rent would be, but it's still building equity for him and not you. If he's explicitly told you that the flat is "his," that means he has no thoughts of ever adding you to it, marrying you, or sharing it with you.

Here's what I would do... Move back in with your parents (or rent a place) without breaking up with him. Tell him that you need your space, and you can't have your own space in his flat. Once he realizes that you're not going to pay the mortgage that following month (doesn't hurt your credit, after all) he'll want you back. Tell him you love him and want to continue to be with him, but you'll move back in only if you rname is on the mortgage.

Run!! and don't look back. you deserve better. my ex owes me 7K b/c of a very similar situation. you don't want that. trust me.

Thank god your not married and you are free to walk away so do it!!! He sounds like a complete **** head.... Just out of interest is he an only child??

move out. get your own flat. he doesn't sound like he's trying to build anything with you.